Dreamer's Dilemma
Remind me of my childhood,
where everything felt okay,
though I know now nothing
was okay. I smiled for youth,
dreaming "when I grow up,
I will be a great person,
with a kind heart, ready
to help everyone. I dreamt
to be an engineer, astronaut,
physicist, a scientist, a doctor.
As I grew up, I never imagined
how life would have turned out.
I made it to the university,
as a medical student. Priorities
are changing, questions are weighing
in my mind. "Will I be able
to help a person needing my help?",
"will I keep my vows?", "was this
my dream job?", "am I on the
right path?". Things seemed hard
to me, so heavy. I fight with temptations.
I also dream of a beautiful life,
beautiful home, beautiful wife,
beautiful life, peaceful life. But as I look
at my parents, they are getting old,
and I can’t help. My mind is filled
with anxiety, I'm thinking too much
of what will happen. What will happen
if I won't make it in time? Dear God,
please raise Your hand and point me
in the right direction. I'm worried
that if I continue running my life
I will ruin it. I surrender to You.
Take all my weaknesses, addictions,
keep me away from temptations.
Grant my wishes as You see fit
and keep me distant from the
evil. Amen. May Your light guide
my every step, and bring peace
to my troubled heart.
Copyright ©
Frank Mashina
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