April Fools' Occurs First Day of Fourth Month
April fools' occurs first day of fourth month
Ordinarily all manner
of tomfoolery doth abound,
celebrated for countless centuries
by different cultures,
though exact origins remain
shrouded in mystery,
nevertheless quasi holiday of sorts
begat courtesy primitive precursor
to Central Intelligence Agency
nsync with Federal
Bureau of Investigations
equivalent to Fred Flintstones
as spymasters forebears,
whose true identity
dubbed secret double agent
linkedin to Bedrock background
check, where court jester donned
as most important person and crowned
accordingly prevaricating
without suffering any retribution,
saying the unpopular king drowned.
The following poem
written/updated since last year
unlike any other
when out of this world
outlandish accouterments
people did wear
hermetically sealed
of even faintest tear
to avoid contamination
against coronavirus
air supply difficult to spare,
when wing and prayer
soul saving amazing grace
analogous to can opener
regarding necessary kitchenware,
which empty canned food tins
helps putting out
little fires everywhere.
Pandemic straps tightly
plied girded beltway
unlike any other All fools day
in annals of recorded ("fake") history
western civilization tapestry doth fray
April first two thousand and twenty three
neigh, no time for horseplay
what with coronavirus (COVID-19)
boarded ship of jilted fools
(think Homo sapiens)
barred courtesy omnipotent jackstay
furloughed workers analogous
grumpy minions lay
dwarfed by unfortunate
uncontrollable pandemonium and melee
global events, née...
germinating, jackknifing,
and wreaking havoc
Mother Earth nonchalantly toying
(indiscriminately) regarding humanity
as bestrewing bajillion biohazards berserkly
bequeathing bedlam child's play
just desserts, she doth understandably repay
man/womankind flicked as flotsam and jetsam
vile treatment diabolically heaped,
jubilantly loosed, maniacally pitched
upon her terrestrial firma oy vey
she chokes, gags, laughs raspily yea
rebuffs, refuses, and renounces further abuse.
Nevertheless toothless gumption, albeit feeble
fighting spirit, her survival instincts assail
cumulative environmental destruction
triggered casus belli expelling deadly toxins,
when Gaia doth exhale
since onset of global interregnum
(think virulent spreading poisonous Kudzu
like wildfire biohazard)
since world wide webbed disease
brought grinding halt
consumerist paradigm in lockdown,
nonetheless within brief interim
noticeable clearer air to inhale
amazingly enough postal system...
intact voila... uninterrupted
delivery of (nope – sorry) no mail,
the daily highlight experienced
among people emotionally crippled
pasty faced and pale
finds quivering Captain Kangaroo
plus good n plenti proud primates
each dancing and quivering
like a captive (dan gulling) quail.
Copyright ©
Matthew Harris
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