Ryne Sandberg has passed away
For this special soul, baseball prays
One year he could not give his all every day
What’d he do? ~ He gave back his pay*
____________________________________
*That year, Ryne had inked a contract for the
highest single-year salary every paid a base-
ball player to that point in time. Approximate-
ly 8.7 million dollars. He left the team in June,
returning all of his unearned salary to his
astonished team, the Chicago Cubs.
In this lonesome world that was robbed of light, you alone came and lit it up, you are my salvation, my hope and my life.
I have regretted letting you go, I desire to have you at my arms length for the rest of my life, but I surmise, you never would want to be with me again.
I have loved you, and I still do, it saddens me that you had ceased to.
The rich green leaves of Summer die in Autumn
like a love that is no more
both defenseless to the currents of change
tumbling toward an unfamiliar stream
flowing out of a sea
where yesterdays have already passed
carrying dusted memories, entwined by the twist of life
where wishes are hidden with lost stars
of memorialized misperceptions
having come and gone like vanishing time
when the shivering swathe arrived
taking both the leaves and love
on a hopeless journey to non-existence
when emotionless worlds acquired their life-blood
causing my eyes to flow with streams
out of a sea of sadness
you’ve passed by this intersection enough times to know whose light turns green after
you’ve had those petty fights enough times to know that neither of you really mean what you say
you’ve been in this traffic jam enough times to know that it was actually better to take the other route
and you didn't take the other route enough times to know that you always, somehow, make the wrong choices
you’ve broken up with the same lover enough times to know that the break-up isn’t really a break-up
you've messed up your life enough times to know that you might be the problem
you’ve known you were the problem enough times to realize that you probably can’t do better
you've apologized for the same mistake enough times to know that you’re not actually sorry
you’ve made the same promise enough times to know that you can’t really fulfill it
you’ve heard the same line over and over enough times to know that it’s never going to get better
but there is no such thing as enough.
and you’ve said that enough times too.
I`ll die waiting for my life
i am incredibly afraid to wait all the way until my death
its a sad reality im living
i´ve been waiting for way too long
i dont think i can do this anymore
life runs slow and fast and streches all the way to the past
it feels empty now as if everything has passed
and still i wait for something to happen yet i dont know what
i´ll die waiting for my life
im not asking for anything really im just asking for somethting so simple
so pathic and so childish but i do cry thinking about what i couldve had
maybe i am a grown up jealous child or maybe i am just being myself
Often the whispers of regular people visit my noisy ears
and i find myself fighting the urge to yell how good their live is comapred to mine
i want to feel like i have the right to cry and want to die
that way i never imrpove anything i stay still as a rock in a river
Life is slipping away and yet i dont even turn my head to glance at it for the last time
To me its a hopless case that neither you or I can save
Im a hypocrite beacuse i do cry thinking about how
I´ll die waiting for my life
In the years, I’ve walked this earth,
Half spent in service, a self-testament to worth.
Through war and peace, I stood my ground,
After combat tours, where courage was found.
Family tragedies left scars so deep,
Murders that haunted my nights without sleep.
Conditioned to march through conflict no matter the haze.
Immune to the impact, I find the warmth of a familiar place.
When Tornados swept through, tearing apart my dreams,
I always heal from own quiet streams.
Oh Angela, this month has been the hardest to bear,
Smothering, choking, and gasping for air.
I miss you so deeply; it’s a wound that won’t heal.
Like losing my breath in an ocean so wide,
I struggle to breathe with this pain deep inside.
I fight to contain all these feelings I hold,
Yet thoughts of Shane and your babies unfold.
Never once did twins need words to convey,
The bond that we shared in our own special way.
Now there’s a void in my spirit so vast,
A painful chasm unfilled by memories past.
When old age arrives adorned in grey grace,
When desultory dreams of fast fled youth
Persistently insist on poignant truth -
Among a few, stands out one loving face.
That one she so capriciously ignored,
Audaciously still spinning Fortune’s wheel.
While life of youth promised the better deal,
She spurned his love and chose to be adored.
Now by the fireplace she reminisces -
If strolled another path where would she be… ?
Nostalgic tears drip on old diary,
That love, heartfelt deal, she dearly misses.
Time has passed
It was a painful bad time, but its memory has transformed someone’s life
Love has completely trampled him, but its power has ruined the heart
Poor poor man, his feelings were numbed and anesthetized by a hope
He doesn't need this hope anymore, his heart and soul have become…
… completely ruined, a longing desire, he loved this lady; sad desire
Oh, what did this phenomenon sight do to him? To a clean soul
The affection he felt extinguished the flame of his heart
Evil's love saw his pain, his lament, the suffering of his heart
Forget this love, my friend, time has passed
Time has passed, and it will never come back
– Said it Master
While climbing the corporate ladder,
Jill zoomed right by Jack. He got madder
than a wet hen. Then, fit to be tied,
so determined to soothe his hurt pride,
he told lies on her. “Cheater!” he cried.
Everyone knew the unvarnished truth:
Jack was dishonest, mean, and uncouth!
Only ONE paid Jack any attention~~
his employer. I feel I must mention
Jack got kicked to the curb with no pension!
As for Jill, she has earned the respect
she is shown. All know she won’t neglect
any duty, and her employees
know she cares about them. Each, she sees
as a team member she’s glad to please.
Our grandkids have something
Our kids never had –
Two grands on the side of
Both mother and dad.
Our son is their daddy.
We’re urban and vote
For the Democrats and
Of the arts we take note.
The others (that’s Grandma
And Pop-Pop) watch Fox.
Their life in the suburbs
Avoids city blocks.
Yet we all love the grandkids;
They see us and smile,
Despite how we watch them,
In unalike style.
With parents away, we have
Split up the week.
We’ve just passed the baton,
Our turn done, so to speak.
Our children are lucky,
(They don’t know how much)
With two fit sets of grands
To come through in the clutch.
We all have those moments. Moments in life when you know things will never be the same for you. For me that moment was seeing Fred's black Pumas on the stairs after he had passed away. The empty shoes gave me a flash back. I saw him standing at the kitchenette counter in his scrubs and the same all-black althetic sneakers preparing my morning coffee and vitamins. His light blue scrubs unable to hide his hulking shoulders and chest , yet loose on his flat stomach. In his stead i'd find a freshly pressed coffee, vitamins and water bottle in a row on the counter. A true care taker of a care taker. At one time, these little acts of service became a welcomed routine. Now... the same shoes sat empty and lonely on the steps toward where we used to live. Which was now just an empty room. Fredy'd never have a chance to Be. A chance to better himself. A chance at Love again , which I know he had a lot of to give. The empty shoes filled my heart with sadness. The thought that his large heart no longer beat in his chest was almost too much for me to bear. Who could ever fill this man's shoes? As a Brother, a Son, Grandson and Caretaker, as a Lover or as a Best Friend.
Even After We've Passed
Something about you
Resonates with me.
It’s hard to describe it;
I don’t have the words,
But I know it exists.
Though it sounds absurd,
Everything about you
Resonates with me.
Being around you
Illuminates me.
It gives me a reason,
Hope for tomorrow,
For more than a season.
Like love’s afterglow,
Just staying around you
Illuminates me.
(Chorus)
Is there a religion, church or belief,
That really, really, believes in forever?
A forever where we could stay together?
If there isn’t, then what’s the point of believing?
If there isn’t, then what are we doing here?
“Till death do us part”
Is not enough time.
When I gave you my heart,
I meant for all time.
I couldn’t just want you
The rest of my life.
Even after we’ve passed,
You should be my wife.
Repeat last verse and fade on chorus)
As I stand at the edge of a cliff I find myself terrified of an ugly truth staring me in the face.
To jump off this cliff would be a terrible disgrace.
Despite the pain that has claimed sanctuary in my brain I prefer to move forward.
Today, I am just as appreciative of this puzzle called life as the thought of it's climax to erase the strife.
I beg you to listen to what I have to say in the hope that it can help you no matter the way.
It's better to suffer with the hope of a reprieve then it would be to end early with an untimely leave.
Brain cancer was hard, OCD is absolute hell. However, courage is a companion no matter where you dwell.
The day you passed
Empty is my heart, full is my mind: filled with what ifs the Shoulda Woulda could have been. Cold nights now, no longer enthralled by your raw essence saltiness after shave and metal. Just thinking of it sends Shivers up my spine, and drives me mental.
The shenanigans twinkling in your eye, the shape of your lip as it traces on my thigh the touch of your hand caressing my shape and back up again.
Sensing your breath upon my neck, callused but soft are your hands, as a mere whimper escapes my mouth.
Now all I see is your death and not your member or our sex.
Your pecs Where it connects to your chest the place I would lay my head and rest there’ your gunshot wound.
In that spot as I lay listening to the pounding feeling you throbbing harder.
Now thoughts of unpleasant thoughts, atrium cardias to rigamortis spooning on me in our bed.
Nighta full of Terror and torture I'm now a mourners with PTSD and anxiety disorder.
I must have been too vocal on my application
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