Dog Nonsense Poems

Cow is very close to Pig
Pig is busy
busy streets and restaurants
plenty of eating and dining out

Cow is also close to Sheep
Sheep is nice
quaint and picturesque
numerous...

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I thought to bring you
a rose...but roses, short lived
dry, and fall petally away -- 

I thought to bring you a
manufactured heart: made of
chocolate or silk

but...

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Put a flipper on a kipper if you want to toast a seal 
Put a bloater in a toaster for a better fitting meal
If the...

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Blind Man’s Five-Legged Dog Rap 

Yo, gather 'round the table, let me spin you a tale, 'Bout a blind man named Benny, he was never...

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a dog and a frog
who stood on a spoon
and went round the town
in their dressing gown

said the dog to the frog
oh lets spoon to the...

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there's something intrinsically poetic about lists…

1.
bread (wholemeal) 
twelve eggs
solar panels
occasional frogs
corporate lawyers
steam


2.
onions (red) 
tomatoes (finely chopped) 
garlic (four cloves) 
fireman's ladder (aluminium) 
disparity (secretly hidden)...

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wave wave wave 
a mouth an ocean
tongue slobbering like a big slobbery dog
licking my face
wave wave wave
zave mave jave
licking my face an ocean wave
mouth of...

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so walking through the forest
out walking on a walk
passing tree after tree after tree
then a tree showed me its bark
interesting I thought
and so too did...

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Me
And so there I was
in a house, but it wasn't a house
it was a shop, but not any old shop
it was my house and I...

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Dong was a song
that Fung the dog sung

Moke was a joke
that Poke the pig spoke

the Ked, a book that was read
is what Uncle Ned said

so...

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once a small dog named willie

liked stealing alum chili

far into the night

he'd chomp and he'd bite

until his mouth felt silly.
...

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I think of scary things, it seems, 
As dogs that jump like cats, in dreams. 
They say I spend too much time caring 
With no...

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Two wiener dogs meet
Each yap loudly, strangely greet
Oddly on the street

Hounds bite other's butt 
Owner blames the other's mutt
Not open and shut

I note discreetly,
"Both were...

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Had a big dog for to tend the sheep
Small dog for a ratter while we sleep
Old spot for all to pet
Growler for warn he let
All...

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A cat and a dog, marinated delight,
In a frying pan, they engaged in a fight,
Their sizzles did soar,
Mom kicked the pan, what a roar!
Dinner was...

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