Best Mayonnaise Poems

That's it, I've had it
She uses Miracle Whip on her sandwich
I just can't handle this, I can't take anymore
I am real careful when I leave how I slam the door
When I left, I took with me
Not clothes or money
No rare painting or the Mingh Dynasty...

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I had a dream once, years ago.

  I found myself on a beach
  Beside a windless sea that stretched to the horizon;
  In the other direction was a empty expanse of sand. 
  And on the beach stood
  A scrawny...

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Contemplating the versatility of Mayo
And all that can be done with it
From the slathering on whilst sun bathing
To globbing it on my bologna sandwich

I find it tantalizing to the tastebuds
And it sure does sizzle in the sun
I once applied to much and set my toes...

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Pressed between twin stale realities,
a mixture of marble thoughts
Dark desires swirling around light devotion,
closet of moth-eaten moral legalities

Lettuce bed of flesh profiteering,
aorta slices of tomato fears
Asphalt of exhausted tears,
lip loyalty was bordello bought

Egged on by the sweet taste of a tainted tart ego,
soul slathering jive...

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I had put our meeting off so many times for fear that it would fail, and be a waste of time. I prepared a lovely salad. Thought I'd make some mayonnaise. The kind I thought you liked, with a yolk of free-range eggs, gluten-free and...

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