Best Cockney Poems

A cockney from over the water
Had a wife and a tasty young daughter
They would lead him a dance
And he stood not a chance
Cos they both never did what they oughta...

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I was born within the sound of Bow bells in the east end of London, this makes me a true cockney, I own a cock and sparrow down by the shake and shiver, I sell april showers, I duke of kent  my pope in...

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I right fancy an itchy ring
'Ope it's itchy teeth in my ivory band
to calm the hunger in my mathew kelly.
I right fancy an isle of skye, to help the inspector and tickle my Irish rose.
I bring my intercity due to inflashun, innit?!!



Translation:
I desire to go...

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My basin of gravy has the worst raspberry tart...

My baby has the worst farts(translation)

My man's ian beale blotto, so 'es intercity is spent...

translation:  My man's real drunk, so he's spent his money....

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Sovrinty’s a grand ole gent,
But sovrinty don’t pay the rent.
I got six kids’ moufs to feed.
Sqeezin’ stones don’t make ‘em bleed.
Theresa gal sure went and blew it,
But oo blimmin’ else is there to ’ do it?
Oo else is there to clear the fog?
Wot’s your take,...

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I was haulin' a heavy load
Up the frog an' toad,
When down poured the pleasure an' pain
To my dismay.

Once home I received an' invitation
To a good ol' gay an' hearty!
I was promised plenty o' laughs,
Box o' toys an' lots of give an' take.
An' this was to...

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Light
structures
of colour-
in a painted
mist

Ekphrasis after Turner...

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You played Judy Teen,
became our Top of the Pops,
strumming Spanish strings
in that epic bowler hat,
somehow breaking every code.

...

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Jellied eels and pie n mash.
East London Fair, and that’s a fact.
The Dockers hands, and the pearly kings.
Their romance gone, the truth it stings.
The Bow Bells ring, they sound out loud.
Cockney chests, they puff out proud.
Not much left of old world London town.
Inside office blocks...

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