Best Boris Poems

(To the tune of Robin Hood)

Boris Blood Boris Blood
Mayor of London town
Boris Blood Boris Blood
Some say he;s a clownl

Takes off the poor
Gives to the rich
Boris...

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Boris and Doris


There was a man name Boris
who had a wife name Doris
when he coughed
wife did scoff
they both couldn't sing chorus.


Written: Nov. 9, 2015
Theresa...

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Boris the wombat was very fat
So fat in fact
That he had to sit back on his hind legs
Just like a dog when he begs
His best...

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Boris was a strange looking creature
The Lord Mayor's pride and joy
The Mayor was known by several names
But officially as John son of Roy.

The Mayor told...

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Boris the Beagle

This is the story of Boris the Beagle, 
Fearless and brave like Eddie the Eagle. 
Ski jumps, sky dives, death defying dare,
Hang gliding...

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PM Boris Johnson wrestles with bad hair days, but he doesn't seem to care!

Would some kind soul lend the bloke a comb and brush to...

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It was the snow over the earth
in every edge,
the candle burned on desk, of course,
it waited change.

Like summer midges in the swarm
that fly to fire,
the...

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Boris is my cat and he’s so very soppy
He likes his tummy tickled and is never stroppy

He’s friendly and gentle and follows me around
Always by...

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Two weeks of sun at Xmas and new year
Palm Oasis in our nineteenth year
Always a joy around the pool we sat
Never did we think to...

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There once was a gal from motor city
who drove a Prius to give her celebrity.
Her guy drove a Ford
and cursed her “Oh, Lord!”
Their divorce was...

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I wielded my sword
And slayed the foul dragon,
Then crammed the vile beast
Right back in his flagon.

Pickled and sodden
There will he lie
Few to remember
Fewer to cry.

Obnoxious...

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Boris Johnson, what a jerk
That irritating secret smirk
That says he thinks it's all a joke
I reckon he's the sort of bloke
Who always gets away with...

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It's nearly time for PMQs
Said Boris, and I've blocked the bog
With one of my enormous poos
It's nearly time for PMQ's
It's hard to verbally abuse
The opposition...

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In my dreams
like many have dreams,
I went to number 10 Drowning Street.
in this pandemic, isolation to cheat,
there is no other better place 
to meet, greet,...

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Quis? Ego
~ on the anointing of Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson

So what if it was just a drunken dare
Quis? Ego! Made at Eton long ago
I...

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