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Easter as interpreted by one... rebated, rebelled, rebirthed, rebooted, and rebuked courtesy one ill shod Unitarian atheist, who means NOT to affect any sacrilegious fallout nor offend devoutly religious man, woman, or child, when the most important Christian holiday notated, a veritable “movable feast” occurs Sunday, March 31, 2024. Though avast percentage of stonehenge temple piloted ghosts, harking back millennia constantly zip unseen thru aerospace, easily being mistaken for led zeppelin, they unwittingly espy woolly sheep hush fleeced herd profoundly religious village peep pull plodding fast as their cleft hoofs take them along well worn path of former crusaders analogous to Riders on the Storm. Among acquiescent, concupiscent fervescent, juvenescent obmutescent (äbmy?'tes?n(t)s), and unreminiscent church going subjects versus one self repentant quest diagnostic shunning skeptic poet suffers interminable emotional flagellation employing righteous indignation against his own iniquitous misdeeds sullying the sacrosanct marital covenant. Unpardonable egregious transgressions committed (well nigh dirty deeds done dirt cheap more'n a dozen orbitz ago) think adulterous flagrante delicto constituted consummating rutting sabotaging high fidelity. Passionate intercourse incorporating communicating non verbal vernacular animal needs spoken on behalf of laity comprising unlearned, nevertheless superstitious population indulged verboten fruit appetite, yet adroit oral (tongue in cheek) spread courtesy word of mouth. Unlike doubting thomas here sitting on his rumpled stilted skin most pious markedly take as gospel Jesus Christ as Superstar every word in religious tomes their collective soul asylum polestar, and doth decree important doctrines with especial accord courtesy the cars equal insignificance applied toward Judeo-Christian holidays across the chessboard of life, thus Easter ranks as no exception to the golden rule, where Santa Claus didst dodge Duesenberg reached an accord following auspicious signs alit in the night sky shaped like a drinking gourd perhaps amassing plentiful harvests upon hamlets strewn across then scantily populated Earth asper cornucopia exhibited secret hoard sharing plentiful Horn (and Hard art lesson learned) to stave off barrenness, ignored going forward seeding nascent March Madness with swift help from Lord and Taylor as midwife hoot tended Ville Nova moored by striking Wildcat fanatics, who unbelievably espied heavens cleft asunder and golden rays poured while collective spectators loudly deafeningly screamed while housed within the soundgarden analogous to ferocious stray cats, who hissed and roared witnessed history scored earning players knighted with Excalibur sword, thence entire team handed Taj Mahal shaped award, which aforementioned ass hide lacks moxie, cuz zit happens tubby April Fool's joke, thus above iterated verses somehow needs just a little bit of relevance to yoke thine admitted ambivalent reaction to sports, yea aye pay figurative toke hen to Rabbinic, quixotic iconic, Hebraic, generic, fanatic, ecstatic primal tribal village people wu clan destine woke, and swinging focus of this poem back toward Religious perp ported berth, when (sans antiquity) donjon we now donning gay apparel trumpet signaled thus, any superstitions blew away dearth when distant shofar heard in every home and hearth anticipating rabbit arrival of the Easter Bunny, who brings eggs sited mirth and hoi polloi doth hop poly distribute sweet treats, which blessed children of the korn as grown adults, no matter necessity for teeth to be removed the sugary over indulgence wool worth today thee American Dental Association chastises candy manufacturers bandying more weight gaining deadly, debauched, and decadent, trait then adultery - verboten fruit to sate hash-tagged (vamoose skat dad dulled) reprobate.

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