Get Your Premium Membership

If Only You Knew

Poet's Notes
(Show)

Become a Premium Member and post notes and photos about your poem like Malabika Ray Choudhury.


May 14, 2024

"If Only You Knew" Poetry Contest

Sponsor: Silent One

My days are dreary as if I am left in a torturous desert yearning for an oasis, my nights sleepless... the brightest stars forgot to shine for me, My love, I count every moment for you to come back, If only you knew, how heartbroken like a wilted rose I am! I earnestly dream of being with you, homecoming birds return together at serene daybreak, My nest is empty, my songs are pensive, mists of misery envelop me, If only you knew how lonely a broken-winged bird I am! Dazzling moonlight at a star-studded night-sky, Sun’s vermillion radiant rays waking us at tranquil dawn, My heart is hauntingly empty and burnt from agony of separation, I crave for your calming presence, In a life which has lost its cadence of purpose! Young love is often ecstatic, and misunderstanding stands in the way, All I remember from my past is... the days of getting drenched together in pouring rain, passionate heart dancing like a peacock in euphoria... spreading plumes in captivating allure. All I remember is walking at midnight under the canopy of a moonlit sky, holding your hand in complete trust, dark and desolate village-path, tall trees gently sweeping and swaying their branches, as if to assure us a romantic haven! Years and years have tiptoed away, Spring appears prancing in, flowers blossom serenading their fragrance and chanting their melodious songs, sapphire ocean laps on the golden sand, praying emerald sky to join its seashell symphony, chartreuse waterfalls stream down from mountain-tops with so much vigour to meet the coral rocks. Why am I alone, why do I feel deserted! you would return soon, If only you knew!

Copyright © | Year Posted 2024




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 5/21/2024 1:30:00 AM
This is such a beautiful flowing poem...on a so very common theme, you made an extraordinary write...kudos to you. One of the super poetess of PS...All of us know
Login to Reply
Ray Choudhury Avatar
Malabika Ray Choudhury
Date: 5/21/2024 6:15:00 AM
Dearest Debjani, I feel completely over the moon with your loving, uplifting comment. You are a busy professional, we don’t get much opportunities to talk …but I know in my heart that you are always there to support me, encourage me, inspire me! This is what makes our literary journey worth to strive for! Love always~ Maladi
Date: 5/19/2024 12:43:00 PM
WOW!!! Congratulations on your win. I enjoyed reading your wonderful write from the first line to the last line. Enjoy your day, enjoy your win..................
Login to Reply
Ray Choudhury Avatar
Malabika Ray Choudhury
Date: 5/20/2024 9:27:00 AM
Dear Paula, you are so supportive! Your inspiring comments give me so much joy and confidence...and I want to write more. Love, Dear Friend~
Date: 5/19/2024 11:02:00 AM
I really loved the opening lines and the metaphors you used to describe your emotions.. Congratulations on your placement in the contest..
Login to Reply
Ray Choudhury Avatar
Malabika Ray Choudhury
Date: 5/20/2024 9:25:00 AM
Thank you, Dear SO, for my placement in your contest. I am honoured. Warm wishes ~
Date: 5/16/2024 12:55:00 PM
Dearest Mala, how I loved reading this beautifully, deeply rich heartfelt poem. So much to admire here that it needs to be read several times to appreciate it fully. So many lines tug at the heartstrings.The stars, wilted rose, empty nest, broken - winged bird, moonlit sky and so much more! Years and years have tiptoed away- really love that line and the wonderful, vivid imagery that follows. The last few lines are so poignant and has great impact. The anguish, despair of separation here is so
Login to Reply
Ray Choudhury Avatar
Malabika Ray Choudhury
Date: 5/17/2024 3:43:00 PM
Dear Christina, how kind and sweet of you to encourage me with your wonderfully inspiring comments. You are a great talented poet - I can see that you read the poems a few times - truly appreciate your visit - I feel humbled and honoured. Love, Dear Friend, your poems take me away to a higher level of spirituality and depth.
Bowring Avatar
Christina Bowring
Date: 5/16/2024 12:58:00 PM
profound and so well expressed. But, the hope is still there with the reminiscence that one day the loved one so deeply missed will return and the stars will once again shine brightly. Good luck in the contest dear, sweet one. I loved it! Many hugs and blessings xx
Date: 5/15/2024 10:18:00 AM
Dearest Mala, between your "chartreuse waterfalls" and your wonderful poetic expressions - "my nest is empty," "the brightest stars forgot to shine - the agony of separation and loneliness surfaces in your longing. What a colorful pensive song! Best wishes for the contest. Blessings, hugs and much love dear friend!
Login to Reply
Date: 5/14/2024 5:04:00 PM
an engaging and captivating poem, Mala! I felt deep sorrow and anguish with these lines: My nest is empty, my songs are pensive, mists of misery envelop me, If only you knew how lonely a broken-winged bird I am! The last lines (if you would return soon, if only you knew) resonated with me. My heart goes out to you, hugs, Sara
Login to Reply
Ray Choudhury Avatar
Malabika Ray Choudhury
Date: 5/15/2024 8:06:00 AM
Dearest Sara, Hard to express how touched I am, with your uplifting comments! I truly appreciate your sweet visit, and kindest comments. Feel fortunate that by joining PoetrySoup I have connected with some of the most talented and loving people I will ever know. I am also delighted that you enjoyed the poem - I am not that great in poetic devices, but I am an emotional person - so my feelings and memories get transferred to my poetry. Every day I thank Almighty for this blessing, and hope to continue writing as long as I can. Dear Sara, You are giving me enormous strength and inspiration with your beautiful words. Hugs ~

Book: Reflection on the Important Things