My Inner Struggle

I've got all these emotions trying to pull me back, but I've seen a flicker and want out the black. By now anxiety and worry gives me comfort, but I'm trying to be a warrior out to assert, this new girl gave life to a dying fire, I'm falling quick, upset if I don't control desire. When girls enter your life you fall for them, but let it snowball and you act a fool to them. I know I need to put the brakes on, do what it takes to be strong, she's to special to get it wrong, so I'll find something to focus on. Why the hell she got to be so beautiful, I'm out of practice, havent played this game since my youth in all. That feeds anxiety, puts me back where I was, but she got me out and I felt the buzz. In a decade she's the only one that could, so now I'm glued to it when I'm not sure I should, the come close, back away balance of trying to feel good, but if you can't control it it never ends good. It's all in my head though and I know that, she might be thinking I'm a total prat, lump it if she doesn't feel the same, I won't go back, cus I've seen a flicker and want out the black.