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(Friend) "Okay dear. Can you hear?" (Lady) "Yes. Yes! Of course I'm here!" (Friend) "Your husband is on to second tee." (Lady) "No. I haven't had my tea." (Friend) "What a hit! Woah! Ho! Ho!" (Lady) "Yes, my garden needs a hoe." (Friend) "Oh no! You've misheard." (Lady) "You want a cow? We've got a herd?" (Friend) "Oh. That'll go down in golfs history books!" (Lady) "I said cows. We have no bucks!" (Friend) "Phoning you isn't working, I see." (Lady) "Who? Who has gone to sea?" (Friend) "We're not at sea! I'm a golfing peer!" (Lady) "Aye! Southport has a lovely pier." (Friend) "I have to go. Here's so and so." (Lady) "I knit a lot. But do not sew." (Friend) "Ugh... Don't you have a hearing aid?" (Lady) "I used to be good at first aid." (Friend) "My train is here. Bye, bye. Choo! Choo!" (Lady) "He bit off more than he can chew!" (Friend) "She sure brings out my fangs and claws!" (Lady) "My name isn't Mrs. Clause!" (Friend) "One more word and I'd have turned the air blue." (Lady) "By patronising me, our chat he blew!" (Friend) "Don't ever ask me to call your wife again PLEASE!" (Lady) "Ha! Ha! Ha! I can imagine his pleas!" Written 7th October 2022 For the "HOMOPHONE" Contest Sponsor: Hat Bueckert
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