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For poets who want unrestricted constructive criticism. This is NOT a vanity workshop. If you do not want your poem seriously critiqued, do not post here. Constructive criticism only. PLEASE Only Post One Poem a Day!!!
8/11/2019 11:29:10 AM

Carmael William
Posts: 2
Blue heaven lies beneath the tides, on a shapeless moon night,
Clad in grey, in boots pitch black, as he stood there.

A man of few words was he,
Aloof, widowed and bleak.

Mundane and labelled weak,
Habitual to be unseen.

Inhaling the bitter cig, he wearily grieves,
Deplorable as his slain dreams.

Debris of fragmented blades ,found entombed in his veins,
The demons framed his own shame , so he prayed, Unfeigned!
but to vain... self-hate failed to abstain.

Bridled by his woes, he mercilessly pleads, to those that he owes,
Disdained by his colleagues, tattling, 'He reaped what he sowed!'.

Destined to be abhorred, or so he believed
Drained.. bound in chains, throbbing with pain...

And so he came upon a painted lake,
Of withered souls akin, languishing, to be sane...
edited by Sofiya v william on 8/12/2019
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